Usually thought of as mousy, meek, and mild, Virgos are actually some of the funniest, most powerful and proficient people in the world. Three of the world’s greatest comedians are Virgo: Peter Sellers, Bill Murray, and Jack Black. Three men who once ruled supreme were Virgo: Augustus Caesar, Genghis Khan and Louis XIV of France. Where proficiency is concerned, consider Fred Astaire’s dancing skill and Warren Buffet’s investment acumen. As far as sexy, you have the likes of Cameron Diaz, Sophia Loren, Lauren Bacall, and Raquel Welch. For leading men it would be hard to top Hugh Grant, Richard Gere, Sean Connery, and Keanu Reeves. Forgetting about power and expertise, what is it that makes the Virgo man and Virgo woman so sexy? That’s why you’re reading this article, right?
To begin with, Virgos are the greatest flirts in the zodiac. If a shy but suave and charming gentleman approaches you across a crowded room, you can be sure you are dealing with an assiduous Virgo who is paying you the highest complement he can by choosing to show interest in you. If you see a lovely, earthy woman who is perfectly dressed for the occasion wooing over a crowd of men with her feminine wiles, she’s probably a Virgo, too.
With the Virgo woman, she’s either the virgin or the whore. For some of you, a virgin is a major turn on, but I know at least half of you have made it your life’s work to reform worthy whores, so she catches all kind in her net. If this lady is a virgin it’s because she is self-contained and not available to revolve around the needs and wants of a man. She’s just really picky. Jane Austen’s Elinor Dashwood exemplifies the refined and discriminating taste of a Virgo woman. This can be the ultimate aphrodisiac if you like a challenge. If your Virgo lady is a sure thing, she is out to pursue bodily pleasure on her own terms.
To be perfectly honest, though, the Virgo woman doesn’t want to marry you. She just wants to reform all your bad habits, just like Marian the librarian from The Music Man. She’ll try to get you to stop smoking, give up sugar, exercise more, and introduce you to some new dental hygiene tricks she knows. Are you familiar with the benefits of homemade toothpaste? Enjoy a 5:00 AM yoga class? Get ready for some fun times.
With the Virgo man watch out for some issues regarding bodily fluids. You’ll learn just how sanitized sex can be. You may have to shower before each act and take up some new grooming techniques “down there” in order to keep his appetite healthy. Just imagine sex with Felix Unger. Oh, and by the way, even though he is a perfect gentleman, he will not sleep on the wet spot. He will, however, touch all the bases before crossing home plate. And he has a good memory for those things that are crowd pleasers.
Whether male or female, mental health is bound to be a topic of discussion at some point in your relationship. If your Virgo has not already called you at an inappropriate or surprising time to share some unbelievably mundane concern, then enjoy the honeymoon while it lasts. Soon you will be dealing with chronic anxiety and the resulting digestive ailments like a professional psychotherapist or this relationship won’t last long.
The Virgo man is a natural bachelor. What you think is shyness is really aloofness. If he decides to keep you around, you will find he is the best roommate you ever had: he’ll do the laundry, cook for himself, clean up after his “activities”, sweep the front porch, and be considerate of your space.
Once your Virgo woman settles in with you, you have a devoted partner with an intense focus on you and your needs. She will shower you with attention in the minutest detail, remembering your mother’s birthday, reminding you of the ATM withdrawal you need to record in your accounting software, changing your digital clocks when daylight savings comes around, knowing the ten places you go most often and getting them programmed in your GPS, and, of course, ironing your sheets and underwear.
Life with a Virgo can be tedious, irritating, and unnecessarily stressful, but you’ll have a partner who makes your life run more efficiently and is devoted to the details of love making.